If you hear it once it piques your interest but if you hear it twice, you know it’s time to listen.

I’ve definitely heard on more than one occasion from friends and loved ones to ‘stop beating myself up’. It used to be a superpower of mine and something I used frequently to pull myself down a peg or two.

One lesson on my business journey is to put down the ‘proverbial’ stick that we can beat ourselves with and practise more self-love, self-compassion, acceptance and gratitude.

In today’s blog I’m going to share with you my lessons around how I master the art of self-compassion when I start to beat myself up. How I shift my thoughts and behaviours for greater feelings of joy, happiness and gratitude.

Cultivating Self-Compassion: Practical Tips

According to Stanford University self-compassion has been defined as…

“A self-attitude that involves treating oneself with warmth and understanding in difficult times and recognizing that making mistakes is part of being human (Neff, 2003).”

The benefits of self-compassion are huge, including…

• Improved happiness
• Good mental health
• A stronger immune system
• Reduced anxiety, stress and depression
• Improved relationships
• A longer life

Imagine how much happier you’d be in both your personal and business life if you practised more self-compassion.

A powerful strategy for cultivating self-compassion is to treat yourself like you would a good friend. Engage in positive self-talk, take time to practise mindfulness, journaling, meditation and self-care.

A recent real life example of self-compassion in my life was giving myself permission to say no to gym night. I’d slept badly, was exhausted so chose to prioritise and focus on my self-care.

What could you do to cultivate more self-compassion in your life?

Cracking the Code of Self-Critical Thinking

Acknowledging your critical thinking and negative self-talk is a great self-awareness step. To create change you must identify common patterns of self-critical thoughts.

You can do this using thought work, a term coined by Rachel Rodgers in her book We Should All Be Millionaires. She talks about creating thoughts to motivate and inspire you so you can create new stories.

The first step is to analyse the negative self-talk playing in your head, because your internal stories create your actions.

What you think affects how you feel

How you feel affects how you act

How you act affects your outcome

So, you need to start with your thoughts and notice the negative ones that come in and flip the switch and create a new habit of more positive thoughts.

New positive thoughts create better feelings

More positive feelings result in better actions (aka less self-sabotage)

Better actions lead to a more positive outcome

Consistent Self-Compassion: The Daily Habit

Making self-compassion a consistent habit on a daily basis will serve you in the long term. It’s not a one and done thing. Think about how you can incorporate self-compassion into your life on a daily basis.

Morning routine – Start your day with a few moments of self-compassion. Begin by acknowledging your self-worth and silently offering yourself kind words. This will help you set a positive tone for the day ahead.

Daily check ins – Throughout the day, take a moment to check in with yourself. Ask how you’re feeling, both physically and emotionally. If you’re noticing stress or self-criticism, pause and take a moment to shift your thoughts and practice self-compassion.

Daily gratitude practice – Find things to be grateful for during the day. At the end of the day identify 5 things that you’re grateful for. By doing this as a consistent daily practice you’ll be able to shift your focus from self-criticism to self-compassion.

Take the next step

Ready to transform your negative self-talk, feel fulfilled, happy and empowered? Explore my comprehensive guide, tailored for coaches, healers, and change makers, designed to help you grow your business and achieve your dreams, without apology. 

Take the first step towards a brighter future by clicking here. Go from self-doubt to self-belief and start your journey to success and happiness today!