Throughout the years in my coaching experience I’ve experienced a range of self-sabotage. From procrastination to putting too much on my to do list and then not actually getting anything done. Over the years I’ve created massive self-awareness around the subtle signs of self-sabotage.
From the shift in the energy in my body, to the repeated pattern of ‘oh I’ll just grab have a cup of tea’ before I do that thing (resists urge to distract herself with cup of tea ☕)
Along my journey of business, mindset and spiritual growth I have learnt so much about my own patterns and I want to share with you in this blog, how I can help you.
Self-sabotage is self-protection
Did you know you could be self-sabotaging right now, just by reading this blog?! The signs are not always obvious, but they’re always there.
Do you ever find your mind switching to deciding you’re going to do that really important thing right now, then finding yourself going down a rabbit hole? (puts hands up) You’re off on Medium, Facebook or Instagram, instead of actually doing something to move your business forward.
The subtle signs of self-sabotage come in different forms but for me it includes things like…
- Ignoring the internal nudge to do the work that will bring in the money i.e. promote my offer
- Making a cup of tea and watching ‘5 minutes’ of The Walking Dead, because I ‘deserve’ a break
- Focusing your energy on what isn’t working and demotivating yourself out of taking action
- Giving yourself too much to do and creating unrealistic expectations so you don’t do anything
- Telling yourself you don’t have enough value to offer, so you don’t really bother trying
Understanding your patterns
Self-sabotage is ultimately a self-protection mechanism to keep us safe from the unknown. But it keeps us in fear, self-doubt and stuck in imposter syndrome.
This is why it’s important to firstly understand the subtle signs and then dig deeper into what it’s really telling you.
A great way to dig deeper is by answering Byron Katie’s four questions…
- Is it true?
- Can you absolutely know it’s true?
- How do you react – what happens – when you believe that thought?
- Who would you be without the thought?
Battling the beast
Self-sabotage can be a tricky beast as it becomes a habitual pattern that we play on repeat. There’s part of us that is aware of the patterns and another part of us that buries the resistance.
So what do you do if you’re stuck in a pattern of self-sabotage that you can’t get out of?
Identify the pattern
Now it may seem obvious but you can’t break out of a behaviour if you don’t have the self-awareness of what is keeping you stuck. Journal on what repeated behaviours you’re noticing in yourself. Or ask your friends and family and ask them what they’ve observed
Break the cycle
Our behaviours become habitual and we play them on repeat. To break the cycle we need to change the record. A great way to break negative patterns of self-sabotage is to create a pattern interrupt. For example a screensaver of your goal on your phone or computer. It’s a way of diverting your thinking and focus and helps break the old pattern. Focus on what you want, not what you don’t want
Create a new pattern
Change the way you think, feel and act and you’ll start to get different results. When you take incremental action steps outside of your comfort zone, what was once unfamiliar becomes familiar. It teaches the brain that what was once was unsafe is actually safe and familiar.
I hope you enjoyed the blog and got great value from it 🙏
Let me know where self-sabotage and negative self-talk is surfacing for you in your business right now.
Do you want to let go of the self-sabotage and self-doubt and step into your full potential, so you can create more impact? Then I invite you to work with me as your Mindset & Empowerment Coach to elevate your confidence and self-belief with deep mindset transformations.
“Suzie guided me through some yucky feelings of being misunderstood and unseen all the way through to feeling COMPLETELY WORTHY. This bright light of mine is shining!! Shining with love and happiness! I am ECSTATIC!!!”