I remember sitting there with my little black book, poised ready to glance over at the top 101 questions for coaches, hoping the client wouldn’t notice my hesitancy. I’d been in my coaching business for less than a year at this point and as much as I would like to say I was confident in my abilities as a coach, I really wasn’t.
As every day passed I experienced imposter syndrome and had so much negative self-talk around my abilities as a coach. I didn’t know it at the time but I was caught up in patterns of self-sabotage and was constantly criticising myself and my abilities, which led to a lack of confidence and motivation.
I want to challenge the assumption that self-doubt can hold you back in your business!
It can of course, but it can also be a huge motivator for you to take action and create massive momentum in your business. I’m very big on choice and I want you to know that you have a choice in the way you think, feel and show up in the world.
But first you need to understand something; you are driven by your subconscious behaviours. To change the way you think, feel and act you must first create the self-awareness around your patterns of self-sabotage to be able to create change at a conscious level. When you do this, you change the way you think, feel and act for more impactful results.
Imagine what it would be like to break free of patterns of self-sabotage, including…
👉Negative self-talk and constantly criticising yourself and focusing on your weaknesses
👉Procrastination and putting off important tasks to the last minute causing undue stress
👉Fear of success / failure and not taking action or following through on opportunities
Let’s look at what’s fueling the fire of these patterns of self-sabotage.
Breaking free of subconscious beliefs
Your subconscious beliefs, typically created in early childhood, will be fueling your negative self-talk on a daily basis. The more you let your negative self-talk rule the day, the more you’ll find you’ll be focusing on your weaknesses over your strengths, which will slow you down in achieving your goals in your coaching business.
To break free of your subconscious beliefs and out of your negative self-talk there’s several things you can do. The first step is awareness. What are the common beliefs that you’re running each day? Pay close attention to them and let them rise to the surface. Get uncomfortable with them and feel the emotions that come with them. When you’re aware of your negative self-talk and the associated beliefs around that, then you can challenge your thinking and create new beliefs.
Getting to the root of your self-sabotage
The deeper you go with this work the more uncomfortable you’ll get but also the bigger breakthroughs you’ll have. If you stay doing the surface level stuff, you’ll get surface level results. To truly get to the root of your self-sabotage and overcome these, you have to dig deep and heal that part of you that is trying to keep you safe.
By connecting the dots between how and where you’re self-sabotaging in your life and business you’ll be able to recognise the patterns that you’re running and with that create change. I’m all about recognising patterns in my clients and love to use my intuitive gifts and energy healing to go beyond the surface level. I can sense what isn’t being said on a conscious level and help my clients have bigger and faster breakthroughs than if they were just to go through this journey alone.
Overcoming your fears
We all have fears and as with self-doubt these can keep us stuck and playing small or can drive us to create the change we desire in our life, if we’re willing to do the work to achieve the results. Fear of success and fear of failure are two of the most common fears in the entrepreneurial world but they don’t have to define us. As Tony Robbins says ‘you can’t get rid of fear but you can learn to dance with it’.
One of the best ways to deal with your fears is to face them. Like the team that I was terrified of snakes and got to a point where I thought ‘enough is enough’. I faced my fear and although it didn’t go away overnight, there did become a point where I realised that my fear had gone. This can happen for you too, but you have to decide that you’re ready for change. That you’re ready to ditch the negative self-talk, feel more confident in your abilities, break the self-sabotage and reach more clients in your coaching business.
I’d love to know what you’ve taken from this blog so share in the comments below what your biggest takeaway is. What are you going to start doing differently from TODAY? Where do you see yourself self-sabotaging in your coaching business and what are you going to do about it?
When you share what you’ve learnt and the actions you’re going to take you inspire others to do the same. Be the inspiration and remember your life is a blank canvas for you to fill and only you decide what you’re going to do with it.